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How to Write a Eulogy for a Brother: A Step-by-Step Guide
Losing a brother cracks the world open. Suddenly, you’re tasked with summarizing a lifetime of inside jokes, shared secrets, and irreplaceable bonds—all while navigating your own grief. Writing a eulogy for him isn’t just about words; it’s about stitching love into language.
This guide walks you through the process with empathy.
Why a Eulogy Matters More Than You Think
A eulogy isn’t a speech. It’s a bridge—between loss and legacy, sorrow and celebration. Here’s what it can do:
- Honor his quirks: That way he laughed until he snorted, or his obsession with vintage vinyl.
- Unite mourners: Give others permission to laugh, cry, and remember him fully.
- Heal you: Writing forces you to sift through memories, finding comfort in the chaos.
Step 1: Gather Memories (Without Drowning in Grief)
Talk to family, but set boundaries
- Ask loved ones: “What’s one story about him that still makes you smile?”
- Use voice notes or a shared Google Doc to collect responses without retraumatizing yourself.
(check this out: Whispers of Farewell)
Mine your relationship
- Jot down fragments:
- His signature phrase (“Relax, I’ve got this”).
- A trip where everything went wrong (now your favorite memory).
- The way he’d answer the phone (“Speak!”).
Step 2: Structure Your Eulogy Like a Love Letter
Sample Outline
- Open with a “Him” Moment:
- “If you knew my brother, you knew two things: his truck was louder than his opinions, and he’d give you his last dollar—even if it was his last dollar.”
- 3 Core Stories (Mix humor and heart):
- Loyalty: That time he drove 200 miles to fix your flat tire… at 2 AM.
- Passion: His infamous chili cook-off rivalry with Uncle Dave.
- Legacy: How he taught his kids to change a tire before they could ride a bike.
- Close with a Call to Carry Him Forward:
- “So let’s be like him: stubborn in love, loud in laughter, and first to say, ‘I’ll handle it.’”
Free Template: My [Funeral Kit] includes a fill-in-the-blank eulogy outline + writing prompts.
Step 3: Balance Tears and Laughter (It’s Okay to Do Both)
Examples to Steal
- “He’d hate this sappy stuff. So let’s roast him properly: Remember when he tried to ‘fix’ the WiFi and accidentally ordered 100 karaoke microphones?”
- “His motto was ‘Why be chill when you can be extra?’—a philosophy he applied to haircuts, BBQ sauce, and arguing about Star Wars.”
Avoid: Forced positivity. It’s okay to say, “This hurts. But God, I’m grateful it hurts this much.”
Step 4: Deliver It Without Falling Apart
- Practice aloud in the car (screaming optional).
- Print it in 16pt font so shaky hands can read it.
- Pause often: If tears come, let them. The room will wait.
FAQ: Your Top Eulogy Fears, Addressed
Q: What if I’m too angry to write something kind?
A: Write the angry draft first. Burn it. Then write the eulogy. Grief isn’t linear.
Q: How long should it be?
A: 5-7 minutes. Short enough to hold attention, long enough to do justice.
Q: Can I use a poem or song lyric?
A: Yes! “He loved Springsteen, so this one’s for him: ‘We’re learnin’ to live with the sadness, but we’re laughin’ with the madness…’”
Your Turn: What’s One Thing He’d Want in His Eulogy?
A dad joke? A swear word? A quote from his favorite movie?
Comment below—we’ll help you craft it into something beautiful.
Need a Starting Point?
Grab my [Low-Cost Funeral Kit], which includes:
- A step-by-step eulogy template.
- 50+ heartfelt quotes and poem snippets.
- A guide to calming nerves before speaking.
Because your brother’s story deserves to be told—and you deserve support telling it.
For you ⤵️
Writing a eulogy doesn’t have to be a solo struggle. My Low-Cost Funeral Kit includes a step-by-step eulogy template and writing guides to help you craft a tribute that’s as unique as they were.
👉 [Visit My Stan Store] to Grab Your Eulogy Writing Kit – Because Love Deserves the Right Words.
